WHAT IS BDSM?
BDSM is a pretty cool acronym that stands for six words, not four:
Bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism and masochism.
Normally one person (the Top) is in control of the other (the bottom). Tops and bottoms play together. Dominants and submissives are people in a relationship. A switch is a person who enjoys both roles. I'm a switch.
So many fun things fall under the BDSM umbrella.
Here are a few things we can play with:
Sensation play (tickling, scratching, ice, hot wax, etc.
Punishment (whipping, flogging, spanking, caning)
Cross-dressing and sissified
IS BDSM FOR YOU?
I believe there is something for EVERYONE in this arena! I think people who say, "That is just not for me", don't realize just what a broad spectrum there is under the BDSM umbrella. They are throwing the proverbial baby out with the bath water. I will even go so far as to say that all sophisticated lovers should incorporate some aspects of BDSM into their love-making at some times, at least!
Images of Tops administering severe and painful discipline is why many people feel BDSM is not for them. They don't see anything erotic about pain and they don't "get it". There are definitely real sadists and masochists in the world, and true Dominants and submissives. If you don't identify as one of those, don't worry! That doesn't mean you won't enjoy this adventure. There are many players who see the pain as a necessary part of training, and they will take it to please the top, but they don't really get off on it. For many it is more about the exchange of power. Since I top and bottom, I know what I like in both roles. Personally, I think that a little bit of pain is intriguing and useful. It really helps to make the bottom feel that the top is in control. It adds intensity to the scene. It creates a bond between the top and bottom as the bottom becomes dependent on the top, striving harder to please, and being more appreciative of the rewards the top will give. It can be very erotic and exciting.
BDSM instruction is available for couples and individuals. If you want to learn how to become a Dom or Domme, I love to teach. It's probably best and easiest for you to start as a bottom and see how I do it. Then you can do it however you want to! The only rules are that everything be sane and consensual. After you've had a lesson or two, we can switch and you can try your new skills out on me!
Whatever FANTASY you might want to act out, is OKAY! We are adults and this is how adults play. Some people feel like they need to put "step" in front of parent and child in a taboo RP and that pretend ages must be over 18 for moral issues, or that there's something wrong with someone who wants to try a rape fantasy. I DON'T. Not anymore. We are pretending.
HOW TO PLAN YOUR ROLE PLAY:
-Choose the ages of the players; young, teen, or adult.
-Choose the level of experience; innocent or experienced.
-Decide who will have the power in the role play.
-Where will the power come from? Seduction, blackmail, bribe, or manipulation? Maybe (pretend) drugs then restraints. Hint: If you're not feeling sure of yourself, let me be the person in control the first time.
-You can say, do, or be anything you want to. You don't have to always agree with me. If you resist, I can work around it.
-Pick a role play.
THEN LET'S PLAY!
-TEACHER-STUDENT: Teacher accuses student of cheating, misconduct (blackmail), or suspect sexual attraction (seduction or bribe for a better grade), or student can negotiate for a higher grade (seduction).
-EMPLOYER-EMPLOYEE: Blackmail or bribe, job interview.
-NEIGHBORS: Blackmail, bribe, or simple seduction.
-PARENT-CHILD: Taboo. Variations, aunt-nephew, Dad-daughter, "sleep in Mommy's bed while daddy is gone", "Come sit on Uncle's lap and do this....
-POLICE-PRISONER: Can be very intense, interrogation even torture in another country, falsely accused to trap the person, or not.
-NURSE/DOCTOR-PATIENT: Come now, we've all got fantasies about nurses and doctors, haven't we? There can be a referral for sexual misconduct at work, real or falsely accused, or taking advantage of patient, sedation, or restraints.
-HANDYMAN: Simple seduction, or housewife is unable to pay for necessary repairs.
-STRIPPER: This time you're allowed to touch, can be blackmail or bribe or not, too much to drink or drugged.
-PORN STARS: We can act like we are on camera. I can hire a videographer (you would be responsible for the bill and a deposit would be required), and you can have an actual video of our time together. Or set up your own lights and cameras. Be producer, director, and/or actor.
-CHEERLEADER-FOOTBALL PLAYER: High school fantasy.
-STRANGERS AT A BAR: Oh, this is a really good one. Especially if you have one of those friends who always gets the girl, or who's a little smug. You can pick me up at the bar, or I'll pick you up. I'll make it obvious that you're the one I want. I've done this many times. It/s quite satisfying. Available off the clock before a 2H appointment or longer.
-FIREMAN: Come for a routine inspection, or I'm in trouble for too many false alarms. Just wanted to see you? Or messing up with a new alarm system? "Please not a fine..."
-MASSEUSE: See how much the masseuse can get away with.
-EXHIBITIONIST-VOYEUR: House guest hides and spies a masturbation session, or another guy can come for a three way.
-CUCKOLD: Similar to above. You sit and watch while I show you how a real man does it. Allowed to join or not.
-ROYALTY-SERVANT: Servant brings wine, feeds, bathes, and massages the other. Anything else that might be requested.
-SLAVE-OWNER: A newly aquired slave can be trained in the art of servitude.
-KIDNAPPING: Objectified. Made into a slave.
-PAINTER/PHOTOGRAPHER-MODEL: Pose nude for the sake of art, or for ulterior reasons. The artist or model can become aroused unexpectedly, or maybe it was all part of a plan.
-HOTEL MAID OR ROOM SERVICE-GUEST: I have a maid costume that's kind of adorable.
I entertain most fetishes. Let me know what your fetish might be. Don't ask for anything sexual or illegal. You can carefully explain to me what your fetishes are.
HOW DO YOU BOOK AN APPOINTMENT?
I will assume you want a GFE or vanilla scene unless you tell me otherwise. It's okay to mention at the beginning that you're interested in BDSM or a role play, but please keep descriptions to a few sentences only. I will send you a BDSM questionnaire. My detailed questionnaire should tell me all I need to know about your experience and interests. If I need more information, I will ask for it. I will also give you fun pre-appointment instructions (for bottoms, only). Your adventure will begin immediately after your screening is complete and your appointment is booked!
I recommend 1.5H or longer.
If you decide to book 1H only, we will be limited to a handful of activities.
Please refer to my etiquette and screening page for instructions.
I don't have a full dungeon right now, but I still have all of the cool toys. I've been to several professional dungeons and worked with many professional Dommes, and my level of experience and collection of toys is as good as most, if I do say so myself.
I will add that because I also do traditional scenes, I see a lot of beginners, and I tend to err on the side of caution. It's very challenging to determine the level intensity someone is looking for. I have clients who say they've done it all who call out their safe word for the littlest things! Then I have people who call themselves beginners who seem to know everything and enjoy quite a high level of intensity.
So, I always start of slow and increase gradually, with everything, when I'm on top. I make sure that you understand how to communicate with me so I know how you're doing with things at all times. And you should do the same if you're on top. The bottom is ultimately in control of what happens in a scene.
Whether you're inexperienced or very experienced, love intensity or are just a little kinky, you've come to the right place!
*BROWN, RED, AND ROMAN SHOWERS ARE NOT DONE HERE.